Lotus addict Trimalchio and jolie-laide boxer Barnaby (plus sidekick Agatha the Swamp Witch and minus partner-in-crime Violette) join forces with Prince Darwin Puck IV, one of the many mortal sons of the vast and inscrutable Queen of Albion. They decide to pursue a bounty offered by Dame Balustrade of the Knights Tentacular and destroy a disturbing black tower to the north. The party decides from the get go to ignore her warnings to not examine the tower closely under any circumstances whatsoever from the beginning, but buy explosives to keep up appearances. The charismatic Barnaby and the dashing Prince Puck spend a day to convince Qelong scholar Pran Praw and Albion druid Arminius to help them. Hiring Gator and his trusty(?) airboat once again, they depart.
On the way they encounter some trigger-happy fellow travelers who open fire when they notice Trimalchio looking at them with his spy glass. The party kills two of them, leaving a woman and her two children alive. It turns out they had fought their way past several bandit gangs, and thought the party was more of the same. They let her go, but keep a crate of her linens as recompense. Trimalchio tries to bind the ghosts of the men who attacked them into bullets, but in his incompetence awakens a crocodile spirit instead. It promises not to eat them if they feed it daily, and they accept.
The next day, a pack of coyotes attacks the airboat as it passes through a narrow channel between islands. The crocodile spirit demands that they kill some so it can feed, and Prince Puck almost shoots the hireling druid Arminius so they can feed him to the crocodile spirit instead. The coyotes attack and manage to maul Agatha before being fought off. Trimalchio takes more lotus powder so he can say goodbye for Barnaby, and while Agatha is not particularly impressed, she agrees to possess Barnaby’s armor so she doesn’t have to pass on to the afterlife. Arminius, not too happy about almost being made into a human sacrifice, runs away, trying his like in the wilds.
The rest of the trip is unevenful, save for the final day, when three butterfly demons attack the boat just as the tower is in sight. One tries to put the party to sleep, another attacks Barnaby, while a third vomits onto the floor of the boat, partially dissolving it. The party dispatches them with ease, mopping up the butterfly acid with some of their stolen linens, and Pran Praq tells them that butterfly demons were once a civilized tribe on their own, but were twisted by the influence of some past civilization.
They make it to the tower, which is located on a perfectly circular island. They explore a tunnel located near the tower (the grass around it is dead, and the plants that do live are growing away from it). They find a single room with a water-filled, transparent column in the center. They see something murky floating in it, and Pran Praq notes that submersion is one of the few weaknesses of the Night Tribe. Barnaby, who had taken one of the butterfly demon heads as a trophy, notices that it begins speaking in this room. Prince Puck takes a rubbing of some strange writing they find, and everyone quickly leaves before anything happens. They spend the rest of the day having visions in the tower, which Prince Puck identifies as a monument of the Night Tribe. Barnaby and Trimalchio acquire a yet-to-be determined new sensitivity to magic, while Prince Puck, already well acquainted with magic, learns the sorcerous art of the Rime Key, but the process permanently turns his shadow big and scary. Trimalchio realizes he won’t have enough lotus powder to stave off withdrawal all the way back to Houndport.
Boat Status: 1 small hole, bottom partially dissolved but still unbreached.
Flowerland Classified #2
I of course try to be consistent/maintain continuity, but one thing I’m figuring out is economy, so rewards and prices might fluctuate some the first few sessions.
- Guards for missionary trip still wanted. 200 sp/guard. Contact Sister Aggorath at the Church of the Queen Mother.
- Looking for scrap metal. Supposed to be a whole city’s worth a ways to the north. Will pay 100 sp/pound. Contact Samuel at the Houndport Garage.
- Rumor has it that the Queen’s Guard has just received a large number of suspicious crates, and they’ve begun to haul them out into the Swamp. I’d like to know what they’re up to, and I’ll pay 800 sp to whoever can satisfy my idle curiosity. I’ll throw in some extra if you find out why they’re buying up golden lotus powder. – Geoffrey
- There’s an eerie black tower not far from the Mockingbird Village to the north. 600 sp to anyone that destroys it. Do not under any circumstances examine it closely. -Dame Balustrade, Knight Tentacular
- 1,000 sp for information that leads to the identification and capture of those responsible for the threats against the Coyote Prince, an esteemed guest of the Crown – Office of the Interim Governor
- 750 sp reward for information that leads to the identification or capture of the Crowley Street Murderer – Office of the Interim Governor
- Giant specimens wanted. 50 sp per pound of beast, double if it’s alive. Contact Dr. Farefellow at the Royal Society Outpost.
- EXTRAORDINARY OPPORTUNITY–AUCTION TWO WEEKS FROM TODAY IN THE BASEMENT OF THE IRON CONCH INN. WONDROUS SUN GIANT DEVICES, ASTOUNDING NIGHT DEMON ARTIFACTS, FASCINATING CURIOS OF THE SAVAGES OF ALAKANTHUS.
Sorcery in Flowerland
The Sorcery of Flowerland is the magic of Night. It is unsubtle and unlovely. It excels at destruction, imposition, corrosion, subjugation, and transformation, while succor, mending, light, heat, and delicacy are fundamentally contrary to its nature. Animals fear it, and spirits go mad in its presence. When Sorcery can be seen or felt, it is cloying, chilling, sinuous, and dark.
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| distributed by Stefano Corso under Creative Commons |
Anyone with the Sorcery skill can learn magical Arts. To do so, they must spend a full day studying one of the Night Tribe’s monoliths, murals, or texts. At sunset, they roll 2d6+Soul.
- On a 10+ they learn the Art.
- On a 7-9 they learn the Art and are scarred or altered by the experience.
- On a 6- they transform into a Night Demon and try to murder or subjugate everything around them.
Upon learning their first Art, a sorcerer’s blood turns an inky black and becomes terribly poisonous. Practiced sorcerers have use for the blood of their fellows, but extraction is seldom pleasant.
There are nine Greater Arts of Night known to the sorcerers of Flowerland. Lesser disciplines abound, and of course no one knows what magics lie forgotten in the Night Tribe ruins out in the wilds. A sorcerer can bring about any magical effect, so long as it pertains to one of the Arts they know and it does not contradict anything about Sorcery’s nature.
- Razor Dance
- Dominion Song
- Rapture Eye
- Night Grasp
- Void Gate
- Venom Scream
- Dream Chain
- Soul Stitch
- Rime Key
When a sorcerer draws upon the powers of Night to cast a spell, on a 10+, they pick 2 of the following, and on a 7-9, they pick 1. On a 6-, it all goes it shit. (EDIT: This bit is adapted from one of the Druid’s moves in Dungeon World.)
- The spell achieves what they wanted it to.
- They are uncorrupted and unharmed by Night’s influence.
- They keep control of their magic
The effects of Sorcery can last indefinitely. However, there are two limiting factors: any Sorcery effect that does not take place instantaneously ends the moment sunlight touches it, and Sorcery tends to destroy or transform objects and people under its influence.
Sorcerers have a Curse score. It goes up when they fail to resist the corruption intrinsic to magic. If a Sorcerer’s Curse score is at any point higher than their current HP, they immediately roll 2d6+Soul:
- On a 10+, they retain control and reduce their Curse by 1.
- On a 7-9, their control slips, and they increase their Curse by 1.
- On a 6- they transform into a Night Demon and try to murder or subjugate everything around them.
Welcome to the Scholomance
Flowerland Session #2 coming up, but I also told my friend I’d run a Magic Academy Gone Wrong one-shot for her online. Started as “Lord of the Flies set in Hogwarts”, but morphed into this:
Centuries ago, a forgotten mystic founded the Scholomance, a college built to train fledgling witches and sorcerers, lest solitude and caprice drive them to make mischief out of magic. It flourished over the years, attracting the best and most ambitious magi, but its final headmaster, the Wizard Loshe, trafficked with what mortals ought not and invited a spirit of foul knowledge and dark power into his mind. It subjugated his will, seized his body, and began remaking the school in its own wicked image. His former friends and colleagues fled, taking their students with them, and sealed the Scholomance away behind wards and walls and unaging guardians. But all did not escape. You did not escape. An abandoned student of the Scholomance, you are trapped in the castle with a mad wizard, his lieutenants, a few wily faculty, and your own desperate fellows.
But you have a chance. When the professors left, the Scholomance awakened. The Founder imparted it with a keen intelligence and power over the castle’s servitors and mechanisms. It retains its full power and purpose only in the Tower of Repose, which houses Scholomance’s dormitories, bathrooms, and storerooms. Here, it can shield the remaining students from the predations of Headmaster Loshe and the demon coiled tight around his heart. In other wings, it is weakened, slumbering, or insane.
Character generation is the same as Flowerland, only backgrounds indicate who your parent(s) are, there is no need for a Sorcery or Shamanism skill, and you get equipment by rolling d6 three times on the following table.
All characters begin with 1 white button down shirt, 1 pair of black slacks, 1 black robe, 1 wand (required for magic), and 6 of the following.
You deal d6 damage unarmed, d6+3 damage with a weapon, 2d6 damage with a particularly appropriate weapon (using a hammer against a skeleton, for example). Each piece of armor reduces damage taken by 1, but you can’t stack pieces of the same kind on top of each other (so you can’t wear two helmets at once).
1-1-1: Spell: Summon Salamander
1-1-2: Spell: Summon Sylph
1-1-3: Spell: Summon Undine
1-1-4: Spell: Summon Gnome
1-1-5: Spell: Summon Phantom
1-1-6: Spell: Bind Spirit
1-2-1: Spell: Unlock
1-2-2: Spell: Lock
1-2-3: Spell: Repair
1-2-4: Spell: Sabotage
1-2-5: Spell: Assemble
1-2-6: Spell: Deconstruct
1-3-2: Spell: Diminution
1-3-3: Spell: Beasting
1-3-4: Spell: Glamor
1-3-5: Spell: Hex
1-3-6: Spell: Obfuscate
1-4-1: Spell: Obliviate
1-4-1: Spell: Illuminate
1-4-2: Spell: Ignite
1-4-3: Spell: Flourish
1-4-4: Spell: Gust
1-4-5: Spell: Rain
1-4-6: Spell: Spark
1-5-1: Spell: Darken
1-5-2: Spell: Snuff
1-5-3: Spell: Freeze
1-5-4: Spell: Vacuum
1-5-5: Spell: Fog
1-5-6: Spell: Magnetize
1-6-1: Spell: Push
1-6-2: Spell: Pull
1-6-3: Spell: Ascension
1-6-4: Spell: Gravitation
1-6-5: Spell: Barrier
1-6-6: Spell: Manipulate
2-1-1: Weapon: Pitchfork
2-1-2: Weapon: Shepherd’s crook
2-1-3: Weapon: Scythe
2-1-4: Weapon: Sickle
2-1-5: Weapon: Hatchet
2-1-6: Weapon: Mallet
2-2-1: Weapon: Chef’s knife
2-2-2: Weapon: Cleaver
2-2-3: Weapon: Straight razor
2-2-4: Weapon: Table leg with bent nail
2-2-5: Weapon: Broom (sharpened handle)
2-2-6: Weapon: Cane
2-3-1: Weapon: Fencing foil
2-3-2: Weapon: Oar
2-3-3: Weapon: Bat
2-3-4: Ranged Weapon: Lawn darts (12)
2-3-5: Ranged Weapon: Bow and arrows (12)
2-3-6: Weapon: Anchor
2-4-1: Weapon: Decorative sword
2-4-2: Weapon: Serving fork
2-4-3: Weapon: Brazier
2-4-4: Weapon: Curtain rod
2-4-5: Weapon: Poker
2-4-6: Weapon: Roasting spit
2-5-1: Ranged Weapon: Tomahawk
2-5-2: Ranged Weapon: Boomerang
2-5-3: Ranged Weapon: Blowgun (12 darts)
2-5-4: Ranged Weapon: Blunderbuss
2-5-5: Weapon: katana
2-5-6: Weapon: Military saber
2-6-1: Pack of cigarettes
2-6-2: Pack of Goetia trading cards
2-6-3: Bottle caps (100)
2-6-4: Box of snack cakes
2-6-5: Pornographic chapbook
2-6-6: Hall pass
3-1-1: Armor: Pot with eyeholes
3-1-2: Armor: Mascot head
3-1-3: Armor: Rugby helmet
3-1-4: Armor: Hockey mask
3-1-5: Armor: Antique helm
3-1-6: Armor: Large skull
3-2-1: Armor: Hammered tin breastplate
3-2-2: Armor: Shin guards
3-2-3: Armor: Heavy poncho
3-2-4: Armor: Shoulder pads
3-2-5: Armor: Fencing jacket
3-2-6: Armor: Parka
3-3-1: Armor: Antique gauntlets
3-3-2: Armor: Plywood Shield
3-3-3: Armor: Platter Shield
3-3-4: Armor: Work gloves
3-3-5: Armor: Boxing gloves
3-3-6: Armor: Garbage lid shield
3-4-1: High heels
3-4-2: Red silk robe
3-4-3: Ragged black scarf
3-4-4: Tuxedo
3-4-5: Evening gown
3-4-6: Furs
3-5-1: DIY tattoo kit
3-5-2: DIY piercing kit
3-5-3: Makeup kit
3-5-4: Pomade
3-5-5: Hair dye
3-5-6: Cat ear headband
3-6-1: Switchblade
3-6-2: Brass knuckles
3-6-3: Bag of rocks
3-6-4: Shiv
3-6-5: Bicycle chain
3-6-6: Slingshot
4-1-1: Cat
4-1-2: Dog
4-1-3: Crow
4-1-4: Serpent
4-1-5: Bat
4-1-6: Weasel
4-2-1: Spyglass
4-2-2: Magnifying glass
4-2-3: Rope, 50’
4-2-4: Bear trap
4-2-5: Compact mirror
4-2-6: Rucksack
4-3-1: Straw hat
4-3-2: Heavy cloak
4-3-3: Umbrella
4-3-4: Tent
4-3-5: Sleeping bag
4-3-6: Box of matches
4-4-1: Wound kit
4-4-2: Curse kit
4-4-3: Vermifuge kit
4-4-4: Fever kit
4-4-5: Cough kit
4-4-6: Venom Kit
4-5-1: Phylactery (full)
4-5-2: Phylactery (empty)
4-5-3: Bottled rest
4-5-4: Bottled dream
4-5-5: Silver hoop
4-5-6: Red paint
4-6-1: Homunculus
4-6-2: Dog skeleton
4-6-3: Chalk
4-6-4: Vial of blood
4-6-5: Vial of blessed water
4-6-6: Sticks of incense (6)
5-1-1: Pouch of golden lotus powder
5-1-2: Bottle of laudanum
5-1-3: Bottle of wine
5-1-4: Bottle of fine liquor
5-1-5: Bottle of loathsome liquor
5-1-6: Bottle of cough syrup
5-2-1: Keg of gunpowder
5-2-2: Magnesium flares (3)
5-2-3: Firecrackers (6)
5-2-4: box of matches
5-2-5: flask of kerosene
5-2-6: Candles (12)
5-3-1: String of garlic
5-3-2: Blue glass eye
5-3-3: jar of salt
5-3-4: wooden stakes (24)
5-3-5: Weapon: silver-plated knife
5-3-6: Silver bell
5-4-1: Goggles
5-4-2: Armor: Leather apron
5-4-3: box of glass eyes
5-4-4: Box of pins
5-4-5: Jar of formaldehyde
5-4-6: Mannequin
5-5-1: Atlas of the Scholomance
5-5-2: Location of 1 secret passage
5-5-3: Demonological treatise
5-5-4: Botanical treatise
5-5-5: Bestiary
5-5-6: Necrology
5-6-1: Flute
5-6-2: Violin
5-6-3: Harp
5-6-4: Pound of clay
5-6-5: watercolors
5-6-6: hammer and chisel
6-1-1: compass
6-1-2: pound of lard
6-1-3: sack of marbles
6-1-4: Copper wire, 20’
6-1-5: dark glasses
6-1-6: camera
6-2-1: tin of fish
6-2-2: name of lesser demon
6-2-3: bicycle
6-2-4: roller skates
6-2-5: pot of glue
6-2-6: bolt cutters
6-3-1: manacles
6-3-2: flask of acid
6-3-3: padlock and key
6-3-4: notebook and pen
6-3-5: goldfish in bow
6-3-6: needle and thread
6-4-1: bushel of apples
6-4-2: human skull
6-4-3: diamond ring
6-4-4: pearl necklace
6-4-5: Sublimated Darkness
6-4-6: Hardened Flame
6-5-1: Clarified water
6-5-2: Rare Earth
6-5-3: Reified Aether
6-5-4: Immortal Blood
6-5-5: Chloroplasm
6-5-6: sack of sandwiches
6-6-1: Malodorous cheese
6-6-2: choice cut of meat
6-6-3: Dead chicken
6-6-4: itching powder
6-6-5: stink bomb
6-6-6: whoopee cushion
Some common enemies/creatures/allies/victims:
- Baglings: monsters of cloth and ivory Wizard Loshe stitches together with magic and spider silk.
- The Servants: shadow-fleshed dogmen with tools for hands that maintain the castle at night. In places where the Scholomance is asleep or damaged, they attack or act erratically.
- Bocklin: goat people that populated a village that was sealed away with the rest of the Scholomance. Loshe likes to tangle cursed thread in their horns to compel their obedience.
- Sophia’s Eidolons: Sophia, the Prime Warlock of the Summoning School, could not escape the Scholomance in time. She has taken up residence in the Library Wing and defends herself from Loshe and his servants with a combination of summoned servants and the forbidden magic contained in the deepest reaches of the Library. Unfortunately, she is stretched a bit thin, so she doesn’t have enough control over her eidolons to keep them from attacking innocents, too.
- Gyges: a vampire and former Headmaster freed from his prison in the Crypts by Wizard Loshe. He is thoroughly evil and has animated most of the interred, but he has no interest in the Scholomance anymore and loathes Loshe for placing him in servitude.
- Dame Balustrade and the Inquisition: a group of knights who claim to have entered the Scholomance by means of divine intervention. They hate magic and all its practitioners, and though the seek to kill the Wizard Loshe for his black magic, they wouldn’t mind snagging a few students along the way.
This draws on: Harry Potter, Seclusium of Orphone, Paolo Greco’s Mysteries and Mystagogues, Scrap Princess’ post post apocalypse
Flowerland 20 Questions
Alakanthus is a mostly-pre-colonial horrible fantasy New World. However, it is shamelessly anachronistic—modernish technology, like airboats, diesel engines, and radios exist. The important thing is that it is loud, unreliable, vents smelly exhaust, and could plausibly be found in a shitty riverside fishing camp. The colonizers, from the Empire of (Pernicious) Albion are vaguely Victorian England. They want Alakanthus, they want all of it, and they have the muscle and money to get it. Full control is still a ways away; Houndport provided a toehold on the continent that the Empire is only now beginning to exploit. The native Beast Tribes are mostly subsistence farmers and hunters, and they aren’t passive subjects of invasion. There have been at least two other major empires in Alakanthus, and the Tribes are the only ones left standing.
Magic is pretty rare. The Empire can’t spare the resources to send many honest-to-goodness magicians (though the Church of the Sovereign Mother maintains some subtle-but-powerful wards around Houndport), and the sorcery of Alakanthus kills or transmutes its users too often for its practitioners to be common. Sun Giant devices are mostly destroyed or locked away in their mouldering complexes. Non-humans other than the Beast Tribes are almost nonexistent. There are a handful of Night Tribe sorcerers not crystallized into monuments or destroyed in whatever catastrophe ended their empire, and a few bunkers still hold fallen Sun Giants, though for what purpose no one knows.
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| by marsmettnn tallahassee, distributed under Creative Commons |
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| by Marie Coleman, distributed under Creative Commons |
20 Questions by J Rients
What is the deal with my cleric’s religion? Most Alakanthines worship nature and ancestor spirits. Shamans can speak directly to these spirits, as well as perceive their influence when they meddle with human affairs from the spirit world. Powerful and canny shamans form pacts with these minor gods, though these deals can easily go wrong, even if the shaman abides by the terms of the pact. Shamans have another job—purifying or soothing the spirits corrupted or enraged by intruders, sorcerers, or polluters. Clergy of the Church of the Sovereign Mother are big NPC nasties.
Where can we go to buy standard equipment? Morrison Morrison in Houndport runs a store most of the gear you’ll need, but if you want new weapons, armor, or anything unusual, you’ll have to find a smuggler or bribe a quartermaster.
Where can we go to get platemail custom fitted for this monster I just befriended? Samuel is a mechanic with a workshop on the southern edge of Houndport. He doesn’t ask too many questions, but the Interim Governor has it in for him.
Who is the mightiest wizard in the land? The Beast Tribes speak of a terrible Pythoness far to the east. Royal Warlock Jack Helton is the greatest of the settler’s wizards, but he has been on an expedition out in the wilds for the last year, and is not expected to return. There is undoubtedly some Night Tribe horror buried away that could annihilate either with ease, but everyone, Beast Tribe and Houndporter alike, would rather not think about that.
Who is the greatest warrior in the land? The Coyote Prince demonstrated his supremacy as a warrior to the Beast Tribes by felling the League Long Crocodile. However, the Old Worlders favor Lieutenant Charlotte Black, who single-handedly gunned down a Bear bandit gang when the killed the rest of her patrol.
Who is the richest person in the land? Interim Governor Lascelle is the scion of a staggeringly wealthy trading company, but until the Queen selects a Governor Proper, she cannot pursue her business interests freely.
Where can we go to get some magical healing? You mostly can’t. There is a hospital in Houndport that will hasten recovery from serious illness and injury. There is a Bat village a couple days to the south of Houndport with a talented shaman, but the Church of the Sovereign Mother is already sending missionaries to convert or reeducate them.
Where can we go to get cures for the following conditions: poison, disease, curse, level drain, lycanthropy, polymorph, alignment change, death, undeath? Powerful spirits, such as Hungry Grandmother or Son of Rain, can lift curses and cure illnesses, but their shrines are distant and their prices unpalatable. The right sort of Night Tribe sorcery could probably work, but they almost always cause more problems then they solve.
Is there a magic guild my MU belongs to or that I can join in order to get more spells? Sorcerers in numbers greater than one tend to kill each other pretty quickly, so no. Students of the forbidden should seek out Night Tribe monuments if they wish to learn more, though doing so risks annihilation or possession by the monument’s resident/prisoner. Becoming a proper magician would require spending several years in a university in Albion, as well as the acquisition of a Magician’s License.
Where can I find an alchemist, sage or other expert NPC? The Royal Society outpost contains scholars from a variety of fields. If you want services from someone with a more dubious profession, post a classified in the Iron Conch Inn, but be subtle—agents of the Queen stop by from time to time.
Where can I hire mercenaries? The Iron Conch Inn is the place to go. Sellswords and soldiers of fortune look for work there.
Is there any place on the map where swords are illegal, magic is outlawed or any other notable hassles from Johnny Law? Practitioners of Alakanthine sorcery are to be sanctified and incinerated by order of the Sovereign Mother and will be exorcised and ritually drowned by the Beast Tribes. Interim Governor Lascelle has banned the purchase and open carrying of weapons by civilians, but those who already have them can keep them without penalty. The residents of Houndport hate this—they live in a frontier town surrounded by miles of crocodile-infested swamp, and so there is a healthy black market.
Which way to the nearest tavern? The Iron Conch Inn is for the hoi polloi. Military officer and the wealthy dine and drink on the first floor of the Grand Willowaithe Hotel, which, while not nearly as nice as its name would suggest, is as close to high class as the monied of Houndport can get.
What monsters are terrorizing the countryside sufficiently that if I kill them I will become famous? Killing a crocodile or python will earn you some serious credit. Sun Giants and Night Tribe sorcerers are rare and extremely dangerous. Members of the Royal Society have been wanting to dissect a panther demon for some time.
Are there any wars brewing I could go fight? Nope, but the Crown is gearing up for a large scale “pacification effort” to create a sister-colony for Houndport.
How about gladiatorial arenas complete with hard-won glory and fabulous cash prizes? There’s a fighting ring held behind the Iron Conch Inn every night. Someone’s been organizing serious gladiator matches out in the swamp ever Tuesday.
Are there any secret societies with sinister agendas I could join and/or fight?Wouldn’t you like to know.
What is there to eat around here? Meat is mostly fish and crow. Crocodile is a delicacy. Planters have had luck with rice, sugar cane, and orange trees, but large farms are rare. Little livestock, since there’s not enough grazing land or grain to feed them.
Any legendary lost treasures I could be looking for? The machines and devices of the Sun Giants, the dangerous monuments and vanishingly rare texts of the Night Tribe, the (hopefully mythical) Azoth Fountains, the uncountable riches of the City of Crocodiles.
Where is the nearest dragon or other monster with Type H treasure? The Beast Tribes say the nearest Sun Giant bunker has got something seriously nasty living in it, but those ruins are also stuffed with some major wealth and tech.
Flowerland Classifieds
Notices posted about Houndport:
A business supplier of mine has gone missing in the swamps to the south. 500 sp for whoever finds him. Ask for Geoffrey at the Iron Conch Inn for details.
Crown missionary needs guards for a week’s journey. Pay is 400 sp each. Ask for Sister Aggorath at the Church of the Sovereign Mother.
Looking for scrap metal. Supposed to be a whole city’s worth a ways to the north. Will pay 100 sp/pound.
BOUNTY: THE CROWN HEREBY OFFERS A BOUNTY OF 100 SP FOR EVERY GOLD EYE BANDIT CAPTURED ALIVE AND 2000 SP FOR THE CAPTURE OR EXECUTION OF THEIR LEADER VISKARION. LAST SEEN IN THE HILLS TO THE WEST. THEY ARE ARMED, DANGEROUS, AND PRACTICE UNSANCTIONED BLACK MAGIC
Entertainers wanted for diplomatic event in one week. Must be able to work with Beast Tribe. 300 sp for evening’s work. MUST WASH. Inquire at Town Hall if interested.
500 sp for information leading to the identification and capture of those responsible for the Crowley Street Murders.
Gigantic specimens wanted. 50 sp per pound of beast, double if it’s alive. Ask for Dr. Farefellow at the Royal Society outpost.
And an image dump:
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| distributed under Creative Commons by Chauncey Davis |
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| distributed under Creative Commons by Kim Seng |
HOUNDPORT TOWN HALL
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| distributed under Creative Commons by Universal Pops |
ELDER GIANT BUNKER ENTRANCE
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| distributed under Creative Commons by Tim Suess |
GOLDEN LOTUS
Imported from distant Qelong. It lets you see the hidden, but also lets the hidden see you.
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| distributed under Creative Commons by Jinjian Liang |
AMATEUR HOUR IS ANON AND AGAIN
I have been trapped alone in a house with no car and no running buses for like three days so I started rereading Richard G’s old posts, and therefore started thinking about rpgs without levels and low magic settings and colonialism and industry and hexcrawls and Tartary, basically, and I’ve wanted to set a game in Florida for a long time and so I made this.
FLOWERLAND: Pre-colonial horrible fantasy Florida
- Hummingbird-people hunt giant crocodiles through the radioactive Everglades as schoolbus sized pythons slowly digest murderous robots!
- Evil(er?) Victorian Henry Flagler digs up weapons of mass destruction from ancient bunkers to defend the insane resort towns his nepotistic underlings are building in the middle of the swamp!
- Heavily armed holy order of missionaries and petrochemical engineers that hunts down shapeshifting crocodiles and panther demons!
- Oil rigs awaken ink-blooded sorcerers from their millennial slumber at the bottom of a vast and cursed lagoon!
- Well dressed stranger perform strange surgeries on unwary travelers!
- Soft sand, warm beaches, venomous conchs and landmines from antiquity!
- more spiders than God can count!
- THERE ARE MOSQUITOES IN YOUR EYES!
- THERE ARE MOSQUITOES IN YOUR EARS!
- THERE ARE MOSQUITOES IN YOUR MOUTH!
THERE ARE MOSQUITOES EVERYWHERE! - And many more?!
Valuables in Albion
I’m going to be using quite a bit of Dyson’s Delves soon, so I want to alter the treasure schema some, so there is weirder stuff than the traditional pieces of electrum and golden necklaces.
When adventurers in New Londinium stumble on a cache of commodities, roll a d6 to determine its size and quality. The d6 can explode (reroll on a 6) a number of times equal to the party’s average level, the floor of the dungeon it is on, or the level of the monster guarding it, whichever you think is most appropriate. Certain buyers will pay more than the default value, but players have to track them down.
What’s It Worth?
- 250 sp
- 500 sp
- 750 sp
- 1,000 sp
- 1,500 sp
- 2,000 sp
Once you have determined quality, a d6 twice to find out what is actually in the cache.
1. Metallurgy: precious substances used by the smiths and artisans of Albion
- Hardened Flame
- Clarified Water
- Rare Earth
- Reified Aether
- Sublimated Darkness
- Immortal Blood
2. Cosmetics: coveted by the fops and fine ladies of New Londinium
- Cream of Shoggoth
- Spawn of Shub-Niggurath ichor
- Spawn of Shub-Niggurath sap
- Imp fat
- Deep One bile
- Refined Protoplasm
3. Medicaments and Prophylactics: treasured by hypochondriacs and the credulous
- Mummia
- Brain mummia
- Transylvanian decoction
- tincture of Dis
- angel tears
- Murderer’s Last Breath
4. Delicacies and Confections: sought by only by gourmands with jaded palates and strong stomachs
- Lotus nectar (black)
- dinosaur steak
- Spawn of Shub-Niggurath fruit
- deactivated pudding (dolm)
- demon flesh
- Deep One liver
5. Textiles and Adornments: beloved by the tailors of New Londinium’ Silken Avenue
- Jungle Ant Carapace
- Dinosaur Leather
- Angel Feathers
- Lotus Pigment
- Fairy-silk
- Demon Ivory
6. Liquor and Drugs: proprietors of New Londinium’s salons and opium dens would quite literally kill for a supply of these
- Soulwine (damned)
- Angel Sweat
- Lotus Liqueur
- Powdered Shoggoth
- Ichor of Gloriana
- Houndsblood
Pernicious Albion 2.0 Character Creation
You are in Albion, where the Romans never left, the pagans never died, and the aristocracy keeps their sterling silver sacrificial daggers in the cupboard next to the fine china. The city of New Londinium, the oldest, grandest, and most horrible city in the world reaches over the horizon far to the west, but you are in Greyshire, a provincial little town known only for the quality of its cheese, the restlessness of its dead, and the large number of barrows, ruins, dungeons, and oubliettes that fill the countryside around it.
Dame Aggorath, Chief of the Knights Squamous, has contacted you with a job offer. A recent washout has exposed tunnels beneath Rope Crown Hill, a site of ill repute several miles from town, and several scholars have vanished exploring them. Bring back a report on what is happening there (along with compelling evidence), and you will be generously remunerated.
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Cast the Dice
When you try something risky or difficult, sum 2d6 and add an attribute based on the action you’re taking. Your success is determined by the total of your dice roll.
- A 10+ is a complete success.
- A 7-9 is a partial success and brings about a cost or complication.
- A 6- is a complete failure. Bad things will happens.
Step 1: Roll Ability Scores
Your have six attributes. For each attribute, roll 2d6.
- On a 6-, the value is 0.
- On a 7-9, the value is +1.
- On a 10 or 11, the value is +2.
- On a 12, the value is +3.
- Strength (Str): Capacity for brute force, physical violence, and melee combat.
- Constitution (Con): Ability to withstand pain, discomfort, and physical damage.
- Dexterity (Dex): Aptitude for agility, grace, coordination, speed, and dodging blows in combat.
- Intelligence (Int): Mental acuity, memory, and ability to learn
- Wisdom (Wis): Perception, sanity, foresight, affinity for spirits and gods, and ability to resist the effects of magic.
- Charisma (Cha): Attractiveness, force of personality, and ability to be persuasive.
Step 2: Calculate Hit Dice and HP
You have HD equal to 1+Con+Half level. When you rest, reroll your HD to determine your maximum HP. If you rest comfortably, set a single HD to 6. If you eat a satisfying meal, set another HD to 6.
Step 3: Pick a Skills
Pick one of the following:
- Burglary: disable locks and traps and pick pockets
- Bushcraft: hunt, track, identify flora and fauna
- Linguistics: learn languages
- Lore: recall esoteric and forbidden knowledge
- Medicine: revive the fallen and restore the ill
- Repair: fix and maintain armor, tools, weapons, and devices
Step 4: Pick a talent
- Hawkeye: Add your level to ranged weapon damage rolls
- English Magic: You start with any 2 1st level spells from the MU or Cleric LotFP lists (though I am only using the general gist of the spell descriptions). You can learn any number of spells, but you must first find them. You can cast any spell you know as much as you like, but magic is dangerous and unpredictable. Rolls generally involve Int.
- Glamour: You can change your appearance and turn into creatures who height or length is equal to or less than twice your level in feet, but particularly subtle or potent transformations may not succeed. Rolls generally involve Cha.
- Pact: You have made a deal with one of the great gods, demons, or fairies of Albion. You can call on them to use magic pertaining to one of their domains as much as you like, but the consequences of offending them or failing to control their power is dire. You gain an additional related domain every even level. Rolls generally involve Wis.
- Prodigy: Every level, you gain an additional skill of your choice.
- Prowess: Add your level to melee weapon damage rolls.
Step 5: Pick a bloodline
- Briton: You are from one of the chieftaincies beyond the grasp of New Londinium’s rulers. Your people made pacts with the spirits of the wild long ago; you can roll Wisdom to speak with animals.
- Changeling: You are descended from a true fairy. You cannot lie or break promises directly. Any oaths sworn to you cannot be broken.
- Deep One: You are descended from one of the marine monstrosities from far beneath Albion’s seas and lakes. As you are some sort of hybrid between fish and human (the specifics of how this looks is up to you), you can move with equal speed through water and over land, and you can breathe underwater.
- Nephilim: You are descended from the race of giants born when exiled angels bred with humans. You are 6-8 feet tall. Whenever you roll your Hit Dice, add 6 to the total.
- New Londoner: Your exposure to the radioactive knowledge-goddess Gloriana has given you a talent for chasing gristly secrets. When you study a fallen enemy, you learn a single fact or secret about their kind.
- Roman: The Empire’s rich tradition of poorly conceived sorcerous experiments not only deposited ancient Britain into the middle of Carcosa, but infused all of its citizens with a lingering taint of undeath. You can cast Speak with Dead.
- Tiefling: You are descended from one of the soldiers that took part in Hell’s semi-successful invasion attempt a century ago. You can create and throw small flames at will.
Step 6: Items
You start with 6 items. You can choose a number of them equal to 1+Cha. The rest are randomly determined. You may do the random rolls before you choose.
1. Weapons
- Hatchet, 1 hand, d6+1 damage
- Spear, 2 hands, d6+1 damage, reach range
- Great-axe, 2 hands, d6+2 damage
- Shortbow, 2 hands, d6 damage, with 10 arrows
- Longbow, 2 hands, d6+1 damage, with 5 arrows
- Rifle, 2 hands, d6+2 damage, 4 bullets, very loud
2. Armor
Armor weighs you down, and you can wear just 1+STR pieces at once. Each reduces damage taken by 1.
- Cuirass
- Helmet
- Greaves
- Shield, 1 hand
- Bracers
- Heavy cloak
3. Tools
- Grappling hook and 10’ rope
- Crowbar
- Caltrops
- 10 foot pole
- Weighted net
- 50’ rope
4. Paraphernalia
- 1 pound of salt
- A book on a random subject
- A horseshoe
- A bottled soul
- A dowsing rod, 1 hand, d6 damage, can detect magic and water
- 10 feet of silver wire
5. Odds and Ends
- 1 pound lard
- Bag of marbles
- Sack with live beehive
- Spyglass
- Choice cut of meat
- Box of matches
6. Dubious Goods
- 1d6 bombs, 3d6 damage
- Vial of virulent poison
- Flask of fire oil
- A glass cutter
- Flask of acid
- A collapsible knife, 1 hand, d6 damage
Actions by Agents Unknown
So Throne is an angel of questionable sanity and reaching ambition, the leader of a desperate host on a radiation-scoured, magic-riddled hell-planet that is partially occupied by the forces of Hell. He says he is embarking on a Project, which will transform Carcosa into Eden and restore the Grigori to the heavens. Others say his Project will turn him into a tinpot godling, while other say it will once and for all wipe out all (un)life on Carcosa, while others say his real Project is even more glorious than what he says it is, while other say there is no project at all, while…
The main thing is that it is hard to tell who’s good, who’s bad, who’s sane, who’s in the know, and who’s lying. Reinforcing that is this handy random table, which will provide a confusing background to the party’s active interaction with angels, demons, and other factions who may or may not have a stake in the Project’s outcome.
When the players attract the attention of angels or their enemies, there is a 50% chance of one of the following occurring sometime during a session. If the rolled event seems improbable or impossible, work it in anyway. NPCs and monsters will never acknowledge any conspiracy character or event under any circumstances. Particularly stupid NPCs might seem unsettled in their presence. The conspiracy NPCs will not appear in front of anything truly powerful, like a god or fairy-lord. Conspiracy NPCs never interact with other NPCs or their environment, except through the party. Depending on their nature, they might show up when rolled even if previously dead or imprisoned.
1. The Lady in Red
She tends in to blend in with her environment—shell be dressed as an aristocrat in a high class neighborhood, as a prisoner in dungeons, as a traveler on the road—but her clothes are always red.
- There is no Throne. It’s really just Something Else hiding its true nature for its own inscrutable(r) purposes.
- You need to listen. The Others will make her do this over and over until you get it right. Await further instructions.
- The last person the party talked to is actually an agent of the so-called Grigori. Kill them.
- One of The Others’ most dangerous enemies is hunting you. He wears yellow, and he has killed before.
- She has broken free from the control of the Others! They are evil and the Grigori are good. You must disregard all of her previous instructions.
- no, no, NO. The last time you met her was her evil twin. You must ignore all her previous statements.
2. The Man in Yellow
He operates identically to the Lady in Red, but he is always in yellow clothes.
- He can hear the Angels. They don’t know he can hear them, be he can. Hear them, that is. They are planning something terrible.
- Don’t drink the water. It’s filled with the Angel’s poison. You’ll believe anything they tell you if you drink it.
- Always cover up your windows. The Angels like to watch you sleep.
- There is a child in black, who draws strange things. They know what’s going on, but that doesn’t mean you can trust them.
- There is a terrible Engine deep beneath the capital. If you destroy it, the Angels’ plans will be for naught.
- He violently attacks the party, saying he can see the Angels inside them.
3. The Child in Black
Never says anything. Always wears a ragged black coat. Otherwise operates as the Lady in Red does.
- Is standing over a chalk picture of a man and woman, both in suits. There is a stylized eye drawn above each of their heads.
- Is standing over a chalk picture of an angel with two faces. One is angry, while the other is smiling.
- Is standing over a chalk picture of a figure seated on a throne. He has no face.
- Is standing over a chalk picture of a burning gate with many hands reaching out of it.
- Is standing over the following message, written in chalk, “THE RING HAS FOR YEARS BEEN SYMBOLIC OF ALL GYNO EDUCATE AND HYDRATE AND ESCAPE OUR ENFETTERMENT AS THE INDIGO CLOUDS RISE OVER THE ZENITH INTO THE ARCHIPELAGO OF OUR CERTAIN DREAMS AND WE WILL ESCAPE THE BOUNDLESS RIVER OF AZRAELS SACRED JEWELRY*.”
- Is standing over the following message, written in chalk, “THIS NEW DAY IN THE PRIMARY AGE OF SUBTERFUGE GENDER WILL BE CONFOUNDED AND SEX WILL NO LONGER BE THE HEGEMONIC SPRING OF LIFE NO LOVE IS THE BLACK DEATH THAT HAS INFECTED US TO OUR VERY CORE WE ONCE NEVER SUCCUMBED TO THE LUSH GRAYNESS OF SLEEP THE ZOAS ARE OUR ONE HOPE*.”
4. Richard and Eleanor
They are polite, aristocratic, slightly condescending. They offer you cigarettes with immaculately gloved hands. They are both dressed in fine suits of black silk. Their expressions are impassive, and while they always stand next to each other, they never quite touch.
- “We do soappreciate your work. Will you accept a token of our esteem?” They offer the party a briefcase containing a single random angelic weapon.
- “Don’t bother reading that dreadful graffiti. It’s simply hellish.”
- “You didn’t hear it from me, but there’s an angel sniffing around. Take care. Wouldn’t want to get caught up in anything compromising, now would we?” An angel of a random Sphere is now pursuing the party as if they had stolen its weapon.
- During a fight or confrontation, Richard and Eleanor watch the party through a shared pair of opera glasses, preferably from a great distance or difficult to reach location. They applaud if the party does well.
- “Hmm. It seems they’ll let just anyone in here these days. Watch out for the riff raff” As soon as Richard and Eleanor are out of sight, a powerful demon attacks the party.
- “How we hate to see you struggle.” Richard and Eleanor hand the party a key. It will open the next locked door they encounter.
5. The Grafitti
It will appear on any flat surface. Always dripping red paint.
- THRONE IS SHIT
- FUK THE GRIGORi
- WE WATCHING U BUT WE ARN’T WATCHERS
- ANGEL’S WIL KILL U
- WE R GOING TO EAT UR BONES
- SEE YOU SOON
6. The Pedestrians
Random passers-by in crowds. If there are none of those, then adapt the event for humanoid monsters or animals.
- Make an elaborate hand-signal while making eye contact with a member of the party
- Say “The Watchers are watching” over and over again under their breath.
- For a moment, their eyes and mouth burn gold and white.
- Lift their hands, revealing wings tattooed onto their palms. They will not be there if you look again.
- Steadily staring at the party as they walk past. Their neck will rotate up to 180 degrees to facilitate this.
- White feathers tumble from their sleeves.